Monday, July 29, 2013

Nine Months

A lot can happen in nine months.  Most women think of nine months as the time they spend waiting for their new arrival.  
For me and so many others in my neighborhood and surrounding areas, nine months has been a long period of regrouping, rebuilding and trying to push forward.
Nine months have gone by so quickly yet so much is still so wrong.  The seasons have changed but the green never came back to most of the trees, lawns and shrubbery.  Trees are still waiting to be cut down all turned a sad, sick looking brown from the toxic water that hit them when super storm Sandy hit us nine months ago today.  
Nine long months, I still can see the water coming up when I close my eyes.  A shiver goes down my spine when we have a big rain.  But mostly, I still hear and see my two outside cats that didn't make it through the storm.  I took care of them for many years and I tried so hard to take care of them when Sandy hit but I wasn't able to save them.  The water came up in a surreal manner and they thought they were safe where they usually hide in bad weather.  Sadly they weren't.  I wonder if I will ever forgive myself even though I know I did everything I possibly could, that this was a horrendous act of nature beyond my control.
Everyone here has a story, everyone is in one stage or another of repair.  People lost relatives, friends, pets.
I wonder when the pain from that fateful day will pass.  I wonder when I will hear New Jersey's slogan "We're Stronger Than the Storm" and not get a lump in my throat and turn the sound down on the TV.  I hate that slogan.  We weren't stronger than the storm and it is foolish to think anyone can fool an act of nature.
My heart goes out to anyone facing hurricane season yet again.  Nature seems to have the real plan for all of us, big or small and as John Lennon so eloquently sang "life is what happens while you're busy making other plans".  It certainly did.
Rest in peace Mickey and Blackie.